It’s been two holy-doodle months in lockdown
And now?
Well now it’s time to double bubble!
G ’Day and Hello my loyal and cherished peeps!
I have some breaking news for ya.
Mere moments ago I was driving back from picking up a coupla coffees at Tim’s – didn’t take a tray cuz the cups were social distancing – when I heard the good news!
Effectively immediately, if not sooner, we have gotten the clearance to S. L. O. W. L. Y. creak open our front doors, C. A. L. M. L. Y. unwrap our layers of disinfected garments, and break out into bubbles! Yes! You heard that right…..break out into bubbles! You heard it here first, folks! Yes sir-ee apparently we are now being allowed to expand our circle of contact, (although no contact allowed!), to family members – the ones you like anyways – (and maybe a few of your very very best besties), who were not in our original self-isolation bubble to come on over for a little visit. But wait…there are a few little teensy weensy caveats to your bubbilicious bubbling; first: all of your windows must be thrown wide open; second: don’t share your utensils (WHO does that anyways!); third: stay six feet apart; fourth: don’t hug anyone; fifth: don’t look anyone in the eye; and the mother of all – D. O. N. O. T. drink out of the same bottle. (Like who is willing to share their next-to-last bottle anyways!)
Quick aside: Who do you think will be busier once this is all over – the jolly people at Overeaters Anonymous or the dry wits at Alcoholic Anonymous?
But I digress.
This new relaxation of the self-isolation rules is being called the double bubble effect. (You can’t make this stuff up!)
That’s right! You’ve got it…it’s just like that double bubble gum we used to chew in grade school before we got old and had to put caps on all of our teeth and can’t even think of unwrapping one of those babies for fear of losing our implants in the magnificent bubbles that we can still blow.
But again, I digress.
So of course, when I heard the Dubble Bubble name it got me to wondering.
Photo credit: clipart.com.email
If Double Bubble, (known henceforth as DB), was going to expand his bubble after eight whole weeks of self-isolation, which of his buddies would he invite from the candy factory?
Well, I’m sure he’d invite Sweet Marie, no? Who doesn’t love Sweet Marie?
His friends, the Three Musketeers, are a definite given, as I’m sure are the Maltesers. (DB believes in diversity!)
Twix would be there (for those who are in-between), and I’m sure DB would invite Mr. Big for all the single ladies. (Cue Beyoncé: All the single ladies; all the single ladies). Skor would be there for sure, (isn’t he always looking to?). And probably Molly-O. (I hear she’s all the rave with the 20 somethings). And of course what would a party be without a Fruit and Nut Bar, n’est pas? Over on the picnic bench Eat-More, (where else would he be?) would be eyeing up the Smarties wondering whether he SHOULD eat the red ones first, and Crispy (would be) Crunch-ing the tunes on the boom box.
If I were invited to be a part of DB’s extended bubble, you know who I would be?
Why a Wunderbar of course!
I now interrupt this regularly scheduled…who am I kidding? I haven’t been regular (that damn gummy bear popcorn) or on a schedule for the past 8 plus weeks now – or is it 20?
But I had to…absolutely had to share this with you my loyal readers:
Speaking of which…I heard someone call my neighbour ‘zipper skinny’ once. (Way back in the land before time when we were allowed to talk to people that weren’t necessarily in our bubble).
And it made me…
Wonder!
Like how easy would it be to get dressed in the morning if you were zipper-thin? When you pulled on your dress, front to back or back to front, no matter how you look at it, you’d be already zipped up. No having to grow your arms long like Gumby on a bender, bending back – back – backwards like a double-jointed giraffe trying to hook the pull tab of your zipper with your long ruby red talons. But then another thought occurred to me. If you were THAT zipper-thin, you and the zipper would literally be Zen oneness …ommm ommm
Soooo what happens when some of those zipper-teeth-thingies start falling out? Would you need an implant so that you could zip-it-e-do-day-back-up? Or….would you just have to pull yourself together?
Man, the world is SO full of amazing things to wonder about, no?
For instance, I know for a fact that right about now several of you are wondering about moi!
But alas, once again folks we are at that part of the tome where I must bid you adieu. But before I do, I thought I would include a little photo teaser for next week’s blog, at which point I will take you on a trip to the magical City of Light, Santa Fe, New Mexico.
Stay good and stay safe…I wouldn’t want to hear that you’d burst your bubble.
Y’all come back now, ya here!
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#Double Bubble
#Wunder Bar
#Eat-More
#Smarties
#Stay in your bubble
#Santa Fe
#Breaking news update