THINGS I HAVE FOUND (OUT) ABOUT MY-SELF…. And other knowledge nuggets learned whilst in Self-Isolation:
No! Trudeau did not SAY throw away the keys. He. Did. Not.
Hello Friends….sending you a virtual hello and friendly updates from my hermetically sealed library. So sit back, relax, don’t touch anything, and enjoy this first blog in a series of the many ‘findings’ that I am discovering whilst in self-isolation:
- I FOUND out that I am much more athletic than I actually get credit for. In fact, I am so athletic now, that I am able to climb the walls 332 times a day! Just wait until my nails grow longer!
- I FOUND out what the REAL colour of my hair is….and guess what? I now have more empathy for skunks.
- I FOUND out that I no longer have to “find myself”…I’m in the same damn place every single solitary day.
- I FOUND out if you eat the ridges of Ruffles chips ridge by ridge, inch by inch, you don’t ingest as many calories as shoving the whole chip (s) in your mouth at once.*
- I FOUND what can only be described as scads of missing one-sock wonders –twisted and rumpled behind the now-sparkling dryer. Anyone want to play virtual sock puppets with me?
- I FOUND, whilst I was cleaning the pantry, a little collection of ashes behind the twisted-cheddar cheese-sticks cracker box. I hope it wasn’t those of Aunt Gertrude, whose urn I may or may not have accidentally knocked over at 3 a.m. one night whilst I was foraging for Arrowroot cookies. Sorry Aunt Gertrude- you know I always dug you……On second thought, maybe that’s what I should have done in the first place. (Sic)
- I FOUND out that I actually DON’T have an indoor voice- just ask my husband FF. (Don’t who FF is? Find out here: https://www.cecescott.com/index.php/ceces-blog/item/58-oh-lord-what-happened-i-m-a-country-girl)
- I FOUND out that in fact money can’t buy everything. (Not, let’s be clear, that I have the money to buy everything- and really the term everything is relative, n’est pas?) Anyhoo, I went to the little grocery store in the village down the road from me and most of the shelves were empty. Where the Arrowroot baby cookies should have been, (yes I’m a closet Arrowroot cookie monster), there was only an empty shelf. Where the rice cakes should have been- I’m trying valiantly to stay on my diet people- there was only more empty shelf. How’s a girl to stay calorie-motivated when the fruit compartments are empty and the cupboards are Mother-Hubbard bare? But….AHA! Don’t worry folks! There IS a solution that works mighty darn fine. (Refer to How to eat Ruffles chips).
The scarcity of products and the ubiquitous empty shelves remind me of photos I’ve seen of Russian grocery stores. (I know it’s hard people, but try and blot out those infamous images of a bare-chested Putin smirking for the camera).
And with that dear readers, I bid you adieu for today. See you soon; well, hopefully! (And just as an aside: how many days are actually in 14 days???? These self-isolation two week gigs sure feel a heck of a lot longer than when I’m on two weeks’ vacation, no?) Keep in touch- well actually, on second thought, better make sure to stay those 10 metres away.
Thank you for reading my blogs, and, if you enjoy them, (even if you don’t!) please forward them to a friend or lonely neighbour- who really has nothing else to do anyways!
And REMEMBER, there’s always something in it for you!
What it’s in it for me (WITFM) you are probably asking yourself? Go ahead, I’ll wait.
Well dear readers, for each blog referral and sign up initiated by you, your name will be entered into a draw for the Grand Prize:
Drum roll….. And the Grand Prize is????
Three, yes! Count them, three! Rolls of two-ply toilette paper – the squeezable Charmaine kind!
Until next time…..Be positive, be kind and be grateful.
Looking for reflections on gratitude? Click here: https://www.cecescott.com/index.php/ceces-blog/item/57-it-s-all-in-how-you-look-at-things
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